Bildon killed Tad. Look, there’s his dagger hidden in the pot of semolina. There’s the proof,” he screamed. “It’s in the pudding.”

What an idiot, thought Madrick as he raced up the steps, the proof is always in the eating.

Ken Magee

Tags: humor humour funny funny-humor



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Und solange nur garantiert war, dass Rava dabei neben mir stand, hätte ich in diesem Moment sogar eine Einladung auf ein schönes großes Glas abgestandenen Blumenwassers angenommen.

Emilia Polo

Tags: funny-humor



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I’m currently imagining a few creative ways of causing you extraordinary amounts of pain.”
Kingsley raised his chin. Mere inches separated their faces.
“Stop flirting. You know we don’t have time for that.

Tiffany Reisz

Tags: humour funny-humor



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...and there encountered with him all at once Sir Bors, Sir Ector, and Sir Lionel, and they three smote him at once with their spears, and with force of themselves they smote Sir Lancelot's horse reverse to the earth. And by misfortune Sir Bors smote Sir Lancelot through the shield into the side...

Thomas Malory

Tags: cute funny-humor smote



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Now and Laters. Starbust, Pixie Stix. If she gets too bitchy, just feed her this crap. As long as the sugar high is in effect, you and the wildlife should be safe

Gayle Forman

Tags: funny-humor



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Dear lord, the flash of his gleaming white teeth was like a hot button to my nether regions. Down vagina! Down, girl.”

Bad Rep by A. Meredith Walters

A. Meredith Walters

Tags: funny-humor



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He was fucking with us pretty hard in the saferoom,” Sandra called from the front of the plane’s undercarriage.
“Aw, Sandy, that wasn’t fucking,” Simon said. “That was just, I don’t know, really obnoxious foreplay or something.

M. Chandler

Tags: funny-humor



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You want to break the curse, I want to break the curse. We don't need to be nice. We need to be effective. Just help me figure it out, and I'll make you a rich woman.

Kate Avery Ellison

Tags: beauty will funny-humor



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Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet.

Santosh Kalwar

Tags: love internet funny-humor valentines-day



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Yes, it’s true. I can now tell you where cups and plates are to be found in my own kitchen. I know it’s a shock, but soon I may even be able to locate a bowl.

Rebecca Ethington

Tags: funny-humor



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