Care to explain?” Ari asked.

“Didn’t you see my signals?”

“Yeah. But they didn’t make sense. Five into one and it’s an intrusion.”

“It’s an illusion! Five of them are an illusion.”

“That’s not the signal for illusion. This is.” Ari demonstrated the proper signal.

“That’s what I did.”

“No, you didn’t. You did a weird twisty thing with your pinky.”

“I had a scimitar at my throat. I’d like to see you try signaling under those conditions.”
-Janco and Ari bickering

Maria V. Snyder

Tags: funny argument funny-humor bickering funny-and-random funny-quotes

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Oh my, you big stud, your dancing boobs have enchanted me with your hypnotic sexual magnitudeness.

Kyle Adams

Tags: funny-quotes

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Mew - mew. Mew.” I jump back from her finger swipes. “I am fluent in pussy, but I have no idea what this fucking means, Georgia.

Pella Grace

Tags: romance funny-quotes sexy-humor

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Who says you only get one? If you're lucky, you will meet The One, The Two, The Three.....and so on.

Nesta

Cathy Hopkins

Tags: soul-mates the-one funny-quotes

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Oh, hey, kettle, I’m pot and wow, you’re black.” - Owen

Olivia Cunning

Tags: funny black force hilarious hilarity jacob owen funny-humor smartass shade pot book-quotes funny-quotes tags kettle kellen olivia-cunning sole-regret tie-me

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Ella let out a squeal when I picked her up, “Jonathan!”
I loved carrying her around in my arms. After all, modern man is just an illusion, we’re all still cavemen. We just wear better clothes now.

R. Matthews

Tags: romance-novels funny-quotes

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I want you to get a haircut so you don't look like Ish Kabibble on a rainy night.

E. L. Doctrow

Tags: funny-quotes billy-bathgate

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I said. “I’m fine. I have a little bit of a head ache, but I’m not dizzy or nauseous. I can walk and talk just fine, and I can remember everything.” “Everything, huh? Don’t self-diagnose, Doctor Fisher. Do you remember when the Battle of Bunker Hill was fought?” “The what?” “The Battle of Bunker Hill. We covered it in World Civ.” “No, we did not.” “We did, too. The unit on the American Revolution.” “Davin, that was like, two years ago! I don’t remember stuff like that!” “So, not everything.” “Everything important.” “That happens to have been a very significant battle,” Davin reminded me, in a smug tone.

J.M. Richards

Tags: history funny-quotes tall-dark-streak-of-lighting smolder-moment-alert amazing-writing-j-m-richards-ftw anna-hurt davin-for-the-win historical-dates tsol

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Quote from In Love of Honey, Money....and My Virgin Passport

If you think you’ve the most wicked sense of humour, try life!

Mita Jain

Tags: humorous-quotations funny-quotes witty-quotes

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We can't against human stupidity. Because they are too many and too dangerous.

Nobita Nobi

Tags: funny fun funny-but-true funny-quotes

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