Tags: funny
Believe me, It would be better if we didn't meet again. Go back to school. Go back to your life. And next time they ask you, say no. Killing is for grown-ups and you're still a child.
Anthony HorowitzTags: humor inspirational different funny killing interesting kind incentive
You gotta be careful: don't say a word to nobody about nothing anytime ever.
Johnny DeppTags: silence funny talking careful
Some people were just getting on with their lives, chatting, being young. It simply wouldn't do.
Russell BrandTags: life youth funny chatting
He shook his head, but I kept flattering him, telling him how fine his beard was, how fair his skin was (ha!), how it was obvious from his nose and forehead that he wasn't some pig herd who had converted, but a true-blue Muslim who had flown here on a magic carpet all the way from Mecca, and he grunted with satisfaction
Aravind AdigaI thought, What a miserable life he's had, having to hide his religion, his name, just to get a job
as a driver—and he is a good driver, no question of it, a far better one than I will ever be.Part of
me wanted to get up and apologize to him right there and say, You go and be a driver in Delhi.
You never did anything to hurt me. Forgive me, brother.
I turned to the other side, farted, and went back to sleep.
Tags: funny
Poncho was in a red mood slanging with rage and needed to cook himself out of it , while shoving handfuls of salted peanuts down his gullet and slurping ice cold Fanta
Saira ViolaThe wolf said, "You know, my dear, it isn't safe for a little girl to walk through these woods alone."
Red Riding Hood said, "I find your sexist remark offensive in the extreme, but I will ignore it because of your traditional status as an outcast from society, the stress of which has caused you to develop your own, entirely valid, worldview. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be on my way.
Tags: humor politics funny fairy-tales little-red-riding-hood sexist
Panicky despair is an underrated element of writing.
Dave BarryI will make thee think thy swan a crow.
William ShakespeareTags: funny
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