If life gives you the wobbles make jelly.
Magdalena VandenBergTags: inspirational cats food humor-inspirational
...once you've crawled into what's commonly thought of as the sordid underbelly of life, you realize it's all just different versions of normal.
Josh Kilmer-PurcellTags: life life-and-living humor-inspirational
If I had created myself, I would be taller, blond, and more well endowed, financially. I would have cast out spiders and bad-hair days. Therefore, and hence, I believe strongly in a Creator who not only gave me the gift, but the free will to create my own journey through life.
Audrey ConnTags: humor-inspirational spiritual-growth
You'll never know what psychopathic heights you're capable of, just lying there on the sofa
Josh SternTags: absurd humor-inspirational psycopaths sofa
If you love somebody set them free- it also works equally well if you hate somebody
Josh SternTags: love hate free humor-inspirational
If the road to success was easy. everybody would be on it.
David R. FranklyynTags: humor-inspirational
I think sometimes people think cheerful is a synonym for dumb, so no one is ever cheerful.
Mindy KalingTags: irony humor-inspirational
In an angry fit, my mother had called him an airhead, who couldn't find his brain even if it came knocking on his door.
Jayde ScottTags: humor-inspirational a-job-from-hell jayde-scott
don't drop the soap
Glasses MonkeyTags: humor-inspirational
My life is interesting enough with out you adding drama, thank you very much. Now can you please leave?
Bryan A. FritzTags: humor-inspirational
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