I didn't know that idiocy caused people to just start spontaneously bleeding from the nose.
Veronica RothTags: humor blood divergent allegiant
Dr. Pervy-Pants
Dr. Depravity
Dr. Ain't-Puttin'-Out
Dr. Bossy-as-Fuck
Dr. Obsessive-Compulsive
Dr. Kinkybones
Dr. Deviant
Dr. Oh-So-Proper-I-Iron-My-Jeans
Dr. Lick-My-Boots
Dr. Smug-as-Shit
Dr. Love-Me-Love-My-Butt-Nozzle
Dr. Damn-Your-Dick-is-Motherfucking-Big
Dr. Full-of-Shit
Dr. Smack-a-Lot
Dr. Ruined-Me-For-Anyone-Else
You ever get the feeling we're in way, WAY over our heads?' Kate asked.
David shrugged. 'I get that feeling every time I go drinking with you.
Tags: humor
Santa was dead, to begin with. There was no doubt whatsoever about that. The after-action report was signed by the field commander, the director of operations, the secretary of the Office of Sidhe Affairs, and the chief battle-mage. Janus had signed it — and Janus’s word could be counted upon for anything he chose to put his name to. Old Saint Nicholas, the Sidhe Lord of the Yuletide, was as dead as a door-nail.
It didn’t stick.
Will had discovered, even before coming to the City, that his muse was, like all muses, an incredibly finicky and temperamental mistress. He'd had several good short stories over the years, a few of them bordering on brilliant, and some of them had even been published; but these gifts from his imaginary goddess of inspiration were, in truth, frustratingly infrequent. She would hang around and whisper in his ears for hours, or days, or weeks, and then suddenly go off on an extended vacation without informing Will of her whereabouts or when she planned to return.
Chris LesterTags: humor writing inspiration
In lieu of Tasers, you'll have to hit me. Hard as you can. Then maybe some kind of fight-or-flight response will kick in and I'll turn into a bat to get away from you."
"Fight or flight."
"Yes."
"Only half of that is flight.
Tags: humor humour funny vampires paranormal transformation supernatural
You're the only kick-ass general I know who needs three gay boys to dress him, John."
"But I only need one gay boy to undress me.
Tags: humor sex gay-romance
I love reading books. You really get hooked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Daniel RadunskyTags: humor
Lennon had a good point when he said that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus, the Beatles have a longer Wikipedia page.
Zachary CrosbyA pair of great heels was much more satisfying than a man. They lasted longer, and better yet, they didn’t leave me for someone prettier.
Cindi MadsenTags: humor men romance relationships romantic-comedy shoes
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