I will describe my eyes and then begin the story. My eyes are blue and resplendent. Now I will begin the story.
Jonathan Safran FoerTags: humor everything-is-illuminated
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.
Jane AustenSpeak in French when you can’t think of the English for a thing--
turn your toes out when you walk---
And remember who you are!
Tags: humor alice-in-wonderland french remember alice lewis-carroll
The miracle isn't that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start.
John BinghamWhat to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.
Douglas AdamsTags: humor survival dying bright-side
I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Steve MartinTags: humor
Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!
Dr. SeussTags: humor philosophy
Writing a book is like sliding down a rainbow! Marketing it is like trudging through a field of chewed bubblegum on a hot, sticky day.
Betty DravisQuestions are like the knocks of beggarmen, and should not be minded.
Flann O'BrienTags: humor
The continual cracking of your feet on the road makes a certain quantity of road come up into you. When a man dies they say he returns to clay but too much walking fills you up with clay far sooner (or buries bits of you along the road) and brings your death half-way to meet you. It is not easy to know what is the best way to move yourself from one place to another.
Flann O'BrienTags: humor
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