I doubt you would recognize an adventure of any sort if it came right up and bit you on the a---

Mother!

I was going to say arm.

Victoria Alexander

Tags: adventure mothers humorous-quotations



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If you fall in love with a character, then you are actually falling in love with the author that wrote the character. Therefore, you could conclude that if you are said author, you are in love with yourself.

Heather Dowell

Tags: authors in-love humorous-quotations



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Reality came knocking but the door was barred

Sydney Mugerwa

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...every year for decades there had been great excitement over the Largest Vegetable competition ("That would be my husband", was the standard comment).

G.M. Malliet

Tags: humor humorous husband husbands competition humorous-quotations



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With a leer of mingled sweetness and slyness; with one eye on the future, one on the bride, and an arch expression in her face, partly spiritual, partly spirituous, and wholly professional and peculiar to her art; Mrs Gamp rummaged in her pocket again [...]

Charles Dickens

Tags: hypocrisy alcoholic humorous-quotations



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How beautiful would history have been if it could be written beforehand and then acted out like drama!

Aihebholo-oria Okonoboh

Tags: inspirational-life humorous-quotations



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Sure I can.

Frank Miller

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For the love of mercy, I cannot walk into mediation with a swollen vagina, Cash. Please.”
I smile against her thigh, rubbing my scratchy face against the softness of her skin.
“Is that what I’m doing?” Innocence—fuck no. I can’t even fake that shit.

Pella Grace

Tags: romance humorous-quotations



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Economize at all costs.

Larry Rutledge

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Men are born with a great asset of weak memory, especially for the bad moments. It’s not the same with women though. Good or bad, they would keep the memories intact like permanent data in ROM.

Mita Jain

Tags: humorous-quotations contemporary-quotations



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