Life would be a great deal easier if dead things had the decency to remain dead.
Doug MacLeodTags: random sinister humour funny
As it happens, I’m a terrible dancer. Bears are simply not made for dancing. We’re much better at sitting and sleeping and singing. But there are humans who catch bears and force us to dance. It’s agony. And there are other humans who pay to watch us.’
Hannah sighed. ‘I suppose you’re right to distrust humans.’
‘And that is why I must eat you,’ said the bear forlornly. ‘For the benefit of the entire bear population of the world. I’m awfully sorry about this.’
‘That’s all right.’ Hannah shrugged her shoulders. ‘Is there any point in my trying to run away?’
‘None. We bears may not be able to dance but we are experts when it comes to chasing things.’
‘What if I climb a tree?’
‘I’ll climb up after you, or push the tree over. It all depends on what sort of tree you choose to climb. Either way, you’ll end up eaten.’
‘So be it,’ said Hannah. ‘How should I prepare myself?’
‘I beg your pardon?’
‘Will you eat me with my clothes on?’
‘Of course. Otherwise it would be bad manners.
Tags: inspirational random funny
Shit, money, and the World, the three American truths, powering the American mobility, claimed the Slothrops, clasped them for good to the country's fate. But they did not prosper... about all they did was persist
Thomas PynchonAt the very leadt, we can grab Monica and hustle her skanky ass back to her dad wile you brave, strong menfolk hold off the bad guys. Right?
Rachel CaineI would rather be strong at heart than strong at mind
Joshua WrightTags: random
A woman cannot ever be sure of not being married till she is buried, Mrs. Doctor, dear, and meanwhile I will make a batch of cherry pies.
L.M. MontgomeryThe lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.
BauvardTags: humor random funny ideas
don't make me throw my boot at you, because I will, you grumpy high testosterone driven male
Keisha KeenleysideI never knew how much I missed pickles and pickle juice. It's like, an overwhelming feeling that I can't even explain.
Nicole "Snooki" Polizziانت لا تعلم شيء لا تعلم شيء على الاطلاق ..
أنا لا اعلم شيء لا اعلم شيء على الاطلاق
نحن نحيا بعالم المجاهيل ذلك ..نتبع القواعد أحيانا وأحيانا نجري فقط لنكتشف نهاية اللعبه
احيانا نصل للنهايه فندم على كمية الاشياء التي اغفلناها والتي كانت ستحقق لنا رصيد اضافي بتلك اللعبه
وأحيانا نرضي بنعمة المعرفه ذاتها نتمسك بقراراتنا ونقبل على تحسين بالمستوي التالي
ولكن احيانا نصطدم بتلك الكلمه السخيفه
"GAME OVER"
والتي تضمن لنا نهاية مفتوحه وبئر من الاسئله نقع به لترتطم رؤوسنا بالقاع فنهلوس قليلا
!!ثم نعي حقيقة أنا لا نعلم شيء ..لا نعلم شيء على الاطلاق
Tags: random life-lessons personal
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