She looked at me, confused. “He hardly knew me. My parents dated and got married before we knew what happened. Let’s just say we were not
brought into the loop on that decision.”
“That’s weird. I wasn’t brought into the loop with my parents’ marriage either.”
“Really? How old were you?”
“Twelve months.”
She giggled. “I can’t imagine why they didn’t ask your opinion.
Mots clés humor harper charley
He bombarded me with words, of all things, apparently clueless to the fact that the predawn hours rendered me incapable of coherent thought.
Darynda JonesMots clés funny first-grave-on-the-right charley-davidson
Dear Santa, WTF...
Darynda JonesWho knew that all this time the nectar of the Gods was in my va-jay-jay.
Darynda JonesI'll call if I break a leg or get eaten by a bear."
"Play like a rock."
"Now?"
"No, if a bear starts eating you."
I thought for a moment before replying. "Do they have screaming, sobbing rocks, 'cause that's probably what I'll be doing if a bear is gnawing my arm off."
"It would be difficult to just lay there and be eaten alive, huh?"
"Ya think?
...But he was a good landlord. When my heater stopped working in mid-December, it took him only two weeks to get it fixed. Of course, it took me knocking on his door in need of a warm place to sleep to get it that way, but one night on his sofa, where I’d suddenly developed night terrors and epilepsy, and that puppy was running like a Mercedes the next day. It was awesome.
Darynda JonesWell, that sucked more ass than liposuction.
Darynda JonesSince I didn't have a candy wrapper to help me with the bad connection I was about to have, I resorted to using vocal sound effects. When Agent Carson picked up, I started my performance. "Agent... Agent Carson," I said, panting into the phone.
"Yes, Charley." She seemed unimpressed, but I wasn't about to stop now.
"I--I know who the kshshshshshsh are."
"I'm a little busy right now, Davidson. What is a Ksh, and why do I care?"
"I'm sorry. My kshshsh... is kshshsh... ing."
I repeat. What is a Ksh? And why do I care if it is ksh-ing?"
She was a tough one. I knew I should have waited and bought a Butterfinger at the Jug-N-Chug. Those wrappers crakled like Rice Krispies on a Saturday morning. "You aren't listeni--kshshsh."
"You're really bad at this."
"Bank ro-ksh-ers. I know who they kshshsh."
"Charley, if you don't cut this crap out."
I hung up and turned off my phone before she could figure out what I was trying not to tell her and call back.
Mots clés humour charley-davidson agent-carson
SARC- is my second favorite -ASM word
Darynda JonesMots clés charley-davidson
Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!
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