I swallowed a hand grenade that never stops exploding.

“Once I dated a woman I only liked 43%.So I only listened to 43% of what she sai…”

“DisasterologyThe Badger is the thirteenth astrological sign.My sign. The one th…”

“We didn’t deny the obvious,but we didn’t entirely accept it either.I mean, we s…”

“I wish slitting the wrist of the clockwould let this moment last forever –your …”