Y'ever notice how you never seem to get laid on Thanksgiving? I think it's because all the coats are on the bed.

George Carlin

Tag: humorous



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Точно когато открих смисъла на живота те го смениха

George Carlin


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Is there another word for synonym?

George Carlin


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If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

George Carlin


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The older you get, the better you realize you were.

George Carlin


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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

George Carlin

Tag: humor attributed-no-source stupidity human-nature misattributed-george-carlin



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There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions, and wooooords.

George Carlin

Tag: humor philosophy comedy george-carlin



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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.

George Carlin

Tag: living-sober



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Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've lost all incentive because we've given them too much money.

George Carlin

Tag: rich poor class-war



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And off we go, out onto the highway looking for a little fun. Perhaps a flatbed truck loaded with human cadavers will explode in front of a Star Trek reunion. One can only dream and hope.

George Carlin

Tag: humor funny star-trek funny-accidents



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