If I could just get Broom to cooperate, we could fly, Glo said. Then we wouldn't have to worry about traffic. Harry Potter didn't have to worry about traffic.

You relize Harry Potter isn't real, right?

Of course, but he could be. I mean, maybe not Harry Potter, but someone like him. Who's to say?

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humor harry-potter fantasy



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Cute? I think my testosterone level just dropped
- Ranger

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humor ranger



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It would be difficult to tell," Wulf said. "I've always been a romantic. I've seen Casablanca twice, and I sat through the entire ordeal of Titanic".
"Didn't you enjoy Titanic?"
"I was relieved when the ship went down".

Janet Evanovich


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My mother drove back to the intersection. "Who are you dating?" "Don't ask," I said. I wasn't dating anyone. I was fornicating with Batman.

Janet Evanovich

Tag: stephanie-plum



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Thank God for small favors.

Janet Evanovich


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There are four ways to manage stress. There's drugs, there's alcohol, there's sex, and there's doughnuts. I go with sex and doughnuts. I tried the other two and it wasn't any good. You being in a dry spell, you might have to rely on doughnuts.

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humor



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I'm done with men. I have a hamster. That's all I need.

Janet Evanovich


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Sounds to me like you're talkin' about the wrong things. Why don't you talk about other things? Like you could make a list of things you won't fight over and then you only talk about those things.

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humor-relationships



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I don't want a new man."
"I'll be dead someday," my mother said. "And then what? You'll wish you had someone."
"I have a hamster.

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humor-relationships



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You know what your problem is? You got too many scruples. One or two is okay, but you get too many of them, and it clogs everything up."
What she said made no sense at all, but was probably right.
"I got some scruples," Lula said, "but I know when to stop. There's a point where you have to say enough is enough and screw scruples.

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humor



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