Toys "R" Us. Zack put on a wool cap and sunglasses.
"You look like a bank robber," I observed.
"No toy is safe.
You know what we learned from living under the rule of Communism?"
"No."
"We learned to get mad.
Will we have bodyguards?"
"We're not quite set up for that. But with all these mothers, you don't need them.
You don't understand how much light you have until the lights go out.
Joan BauerTeenagers are like bees at night, I think. We don't like waking up and we don't always get with the program immediately, but once we figure out our mission, we'll see it through.
Joan BauerHow could a man with so much heart die from a heart attack?
Joan BauerEveryone needs fudge, Hildy. It's how God helps us cope.
Joan BauerTag: chocolate coping-strategies
Sometimes just getting up in the morning and standing at the gate can bring the gate down.
Joan BauerIf she's really psychic," Zack said when he saw Tanisha's photo at school, "why does she need a doorbell?
Joan BauerTag: irony precognition
Why do you think, A.J.," they say in unison, "that you find these boys so attractive?"
I didn't say that this fiery chemical explosion leaps from somewhere inside me. Parents don't want to hear these things. I shrugged and said nothing.
"Maybe you should try sitting on the intensity," Mom suggests, "just until your feelings catch up with reality."
"We could chain you to the water heater," Dad offers, "until these little moments pass."
You see what I'm up against.
Tag: humor parents communication family-relationships teenagers hormones parental-advice
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