Sorry, but the whole walking corpse epiphany kind of threw me off my game.

Rachel Vincent


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So,would you say I’m closer to a zombie or a vampire? I gotta know—are my parts going to rot and fall off, or am I forever frozen in youthful perfection?

Rachel Vincent


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I hate to question
your dedication to the recruiting process, but it sounds
more like you ran up against a deadline and grabbed
the first sucker with the balls to call you out.

Rachel Vincent


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This would be so much easier if they actually issued black hoods,

Rachel Vincent


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I recognize no other kind of ass.

Rachel Vincent


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Just FYI, in your case, I think it’s okay to fear the reaper.

Rachel Vincent


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Uh, yeah, I do. The scythe was a little tricky at first, but—much like golf—turns out it’s all in the swing.

Rachel Vincent


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From adult diapers to bedpans? Move over, Elvis, I’m the afterlife of the party!

Rachel Vincent


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Because the alternative sucks!

Rachel Vincent


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If I weren’t already dead, I’d be alive with joy,

Rachel Vincent


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