Most poetry just confounds me. I really want to like it, but I can't help thinking it's a hoax. (p. 24)

Stephan Pastis


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Everyone cites [Charles Schulz], but it’s with good reason. He taught me timing, tone, character development, practically everything.

Stephan Pastis


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Gary Larson: The funniest cartoonist I’ve ever seen. His two-volume set (The Complete Far Side) should be the textbook in any course taught on how to be funny on the comics page.

Stephan Pastis


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Scott Adams: From him, I learned how to write a three-panel comic. Probably the best pure writer on the comics page.

Stephan Pastis


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My wife Staci made me go to a wedding last weekend...If it weren’t for her, I’d be happy.

Stephan Pastis

Tag: humor



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When in doubt, give a character big, blown-up eyes and puffy lips.

Stephan Pastis

Tag: comics



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On the list of things I cannot draw, wedding dresses are right there next to cars.

Stephan Pastis

Tag: drawing cartooning



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When I say 'friends,' I use that term loosely, as I don't actually have any.

Stephan Pastis

Tag: friends



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Having a syndicated comic strip is a great platform for ripping on expressions you hate.

Stephan Pastis

Tag: comics expressions



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The phrase 'I just turn on my monkey and it makes me feel good' sounds very dirty, but I can't explain why. It's great to try to use expressions like that on the comics page. People want to complain but they can't, because they can't figure out quite what they should be complaining about.

Stephan Pastis

Tag: comics monkeys complaints



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