The recipe for great art has always been misery and a good bowel movement.
Don RoffTag: humor life inspirational art writing nature funny
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Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.
Rodney DangerfieldI came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.
Rodney DangerfieldTag: humour funny neighborhoods
I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.
Rodney DangerfieldTag: humour funny crime neighborhoods
If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
Jerry SeinfeldOnce you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Albert EinsteinTag: funny
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Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Phyllis DillerAlways go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
Yogi BerraTag: funny
The old woman was the kind who would not cut down a large old tree because it was a large old tree.
Flannery O'ConnorTag: funny parkers-back
He and the girl had almost nothing to say to each other. One thing he did say was, 'I ain't got any tattoo on my back.'
'What you got on it?' the girl said.
'My shirt,' Parker said. 'Haw.'
'Haw, haw,' the girl said politely.
Tag: funny parkers-back
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