Love is a damage
made to the heart,
violence,
fate thats written,
Changeable by distance,
Breakable by time...!

Honey Father

Tag: funny humor-relationships love-hurts



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Everything that glitters more than gold is not gold.

Raheel Farooq

Tag: originality gold funny genuineness forgery



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There's a clock on the wall. Press your hand against the face and turn it very slightly to the. Left. There'll be a click to tell you it's done."
"Sounds easy enough."
"Yes it does," said Sanguine. "Kiss for good luck?"
"Maybe later," said Gracious.
"How about a handshake?" Asked Donegan.

Derek Landy

Tag: kiss funny dead of last menulis stand shake



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If he can't get to the clock, any idea how we deal with this lot?"
"With great care," Donegan suggested.
"How about we run off shout and they follow?" Said Gracious. "Then, just when they think they've caught us they fall into our trap."
"OK," said Tanith. "And that trap would be?"
"A big hole we'd dug earlier and covered with branches.'
Tanith frowned. "I thought you were meant to be smart."
Gracious frowned back at her. "Who told you that?"
"Gracious is book smart," said Donegan. "He leaves the real world thinking to people like you and me and small dogs that he meets."
"The innocent are often the wisest.

Derek Landy

Tag: men dumb funny dead dog of last derek stand landy



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When I was small I dreamed of demons. I thought they were under my bed, but you said, it can't be so, you don't get demons our side of the river, the guards won't let them over London Bridge.

Hilary Mantel

Tag: fear dreams funny nightmares demons



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He wears his cockiness like an ironic T-shirt, but it fits him better.

Gillian Flynn

Tag: men funny irony t-shirt cocky manwhore



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Who would have ever thought going to a library would be so scary?

Brandy Nacole

Tag: funny quote thoughts scary racquel



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Way I figure it, if I'm forced to have a partner, might as well have one with benefits. If you're annoying me, fucking you will be more satisfying than punching you." Prophet grinned, then added slyly, "And I could punch you afterwards.

S.E. Jakes

Tag: funny snark prophet



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Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man".

Russell Beland

Tag: humor men humanity funny dating humorous date



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I hear Mr. Palmer tell Hannah that it was an electrical fault. Five arsonists in one school and it ends up being something so technically boring.

Melina Marchetta

Tag: funny irony



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