I have church on Sunday.”
“Of course you do.”
“You’re welcome to come along.”
“Thanks, but I’m allergic to incense.”
“That’s a shame.”
“It’s the bane of my existence.”
- Beth and Jake

Alexandra Adornetto

Tag: humor religion sarcasm



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Not that I knew who you were until last month. But now that I've got you, I'm not letting you go."
"You're not?"
Blake stared at her in irritated confusion. What was her game? "Do you think I'm an idiot?" he spat out.
"No," she said. "I've just escaped from a den of idiots, so I'm well familiar with the breed, and you're something else entirely. I am, however, hoping you're not a terribly good shot.

Julia Quinn

Tag: humor romance sarcasm idiocy



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How long have you been with Raphael?”

“You ask a lot of questions for a dead woman.”

“What can I say? I prefer to die well-informed.

Nalini Singh

Tag: humor sarcasm paranormal elena badass nalini-singh venom



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Sometimes I feel so sick at the state of the world I can't even finish my second apple pie.

Banksy

Tag: sarcasm



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Promise me you’ll look after yourself … stay out of trouble …’
‘I always do, Mrs Weasley,’ said Harry. ‘I like a quiet life, you know me.

J.K. Rowling

Tag: sarcasm



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Mathilde returned and strolled past the drawing-room windows; she saw him busily engaged in describing to Madame de Fervaques the old ruined castles that crown the steep banks of the Rhine and give them so distinctive a character. He was beginning to acquit himself none too badly in the use of the sentimental and picturesque language which is called wit in certain drawing-rooms.

Stendhal

Tag: wit sarcasm personality socializing charm



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I forgot my purse of laughter when I dressed this mornin'," she told me. "Have you not bought anythin' the last few days? Prices have gone up. Pay or starve, it's all one to me.

Tamora Pierce

Tag: sarcasm seller humorous-comebacks inflation hardhearted



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Could you attempt, at least, to make yourself presentable? I know this is a war, but the rest of us are trying to pretend it's a party.

Kristin Cashore

Tag: humor sarcasm



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I couldn't hack it in Hollywood, my writing's wasn't bad enough.

Russ Lippitt

Tag: sarcasm



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Cam's wings were so bright they were almost blinding as they pulsed.
"Holy Hell," Callie whispered, blinking.
"More or less," Arriane said

Lauren Kate

Tag: humor sarcasm ironic fallen-angels fallen arrianne



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