I knew it was beautiful, but knowing something is beautiful and caring about it are two very different things, and I didn't care.

Maureen Johnson

Tag: sarcasm caring-for-others



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How many kids are in the Graveyard?"
"A bunch."
"Who sends your supplies?"
"George Washington. Or is it Abraham Lincoln? I forget."
"How often do you receive new arrivals?"
"About as often as you beat your wife.

Neal Shusterman

Tag: humor sarcasm humorous snark sarcastic risa-ward



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Oh, for the love of God. There is no agent more agent than you. I swear you have pin-striped ties encrypted into your DNA. When you die, the coffin is going to read Property of the FBI.

Lisa Gardner

Tag: humor sarcasm fbi



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How are you feeling?"
I leaned away from him. "Gross."
Aiden frowned. "Gross?"
"I haven't brushed my teeth or washed my face in days. Don't come near me."
He laughed. "Alex, come on."
"Seriously, I'm gross." I put my hand over my mouth.
Ignoring my protests, he leaned over and brushed my string hair back. "You're as beautiful as always, Alex."
I stared at him. He must not get out much.

Jennifer L. Armentrout

Tag: humor funny sarcasm alex aiden



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Just so you know, I get incredibly bored quite easily and you will be forced to be my source of entertainment. You'll kind of be like my own personal jester."
I flipped him off.
"Well that wasn't funny at all.

Jennifer L. Armentrout

Tag: funny sarcasm deacon alex



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We had and incident. I took care of it."
"Really." Jace's voice dripped sarcasm. "Do you even know how to use that knife, Clarissa? Without poking a hole in yourself or any innocent bystanders?

Cassandra Clare

Tag: sarcasm jace clary-fray mortal-instruments



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Life's a party. So smile and eat shit and pretend it's fucking caviar.

Nenia Campbell

Tag: humor life sarcasm



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I get the same buzz cleaning up the yard as Leo Tolstoy did from scything hay.

Sergei Lukyanenko

Tag: classic excitement sarcasm



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Billy tries to imagine the vast systems that support these athletes. They are among the best-cared for creatures in the history of the planet, beneficiaries of the best nutrition, the latest technologies, the finest medical care, they live at the very pinnacle of American innovation and abundance, which inspires an extraordinary thought - send them to fight the war! Send them just as they are this moment, well rested, suited up, psyched for brutal combat, send the entire NFL! Attack with all our bears and raiders, our ferocious redskins, our jets, eagles, falcons, chiefs, patriots, cowboys - how could a bunch of skinny hajjis in man-skits and sandals stand a chance against these all-Americans? Resistance is futile, oh Arab foes. Surrender now and save yourself a world of hurt, for our mighty football players cannot be stopped, they are so huge, so strong, so fearsomely ripped that mere bombs and bullets bounce off their bones of steel. Submit, lest our awesome NFL show you straight to the flaming gates of hell!

Ben Fountain

Tag: sarcasm football



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High School. Society’s bright idea to put all their aggressive, naive youth into one environment to torment and emotionally scar each other for life.

Chris Colfer

Tag: humor sarcasm high-school



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