How do two retards eat a turd sandwich? Well, not by first wiping their ass with wheat bread like I showed them.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


I look like a million bucks, but I feel like shit. Thanks, inflation!

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


The crowd was patriotic, and they were chanting “USA, USA.” Of course, the crowd was also dyslexic out at the state university of Arizona, so it came out, “ASU, ASU.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


A blowjob is the only employment I can get. At least in a bathroom stall.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


I wish there were a way to see through walls. Oh yeah, there is—windows.


Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


It was 7 AM, so what else could I say but, “Have a great night.” Plus, he was as blind as Helen Keller was deaf, so to him day was night.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


My definition of dictionary can’t be found in the dictionary. Dictionary—A linguistic prison, confining words to well-defined cells, with little chance of parole.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


I didn't have romantic feelings for her, but my penis did. So what else could I do but obey the Master?

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


To get him to agree, I put a gun to his head. To get him to not change his mind, I blew out his brains.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


My name is heroic. You just have to rearrange all the letters, and possibly replace a few.

Jarod Kintz


Weiter zum Zitat


« erste vorherige
Seite 638 von 658.
nächste letzte »

©gutesprueche.com

Data privacy

Imprint
Contact
Wir benutzen Cookies

Diese Website verwendet Cookies, um Ihnen die bestmögliche Funktionalität bieten zu können.

OK Ich lehne Cookies ab