For a while he'd tried molding himself into the tragic Romantic hero, brooding and staring clench-jawed off into space as he composed dark verse in his head. But it turned out that trying to appear tragic in Incontinence, Indiana, was redundant, and his mother kept shouting at him and making him forget his rhymes. "Tommy, if you keep grinding your teeth like that, they'll wear away and you'll have to have dentures like Aunt Ester." Tommy only wished his beard was as heavy as Aunt Ester's---then he could stare out over the moors while he stroked it pensively.
Christopher MooreShe knew it should bother her more, being evil and all, but after she put on a little mascara and some lipstick and poured herself another cup of blood-laced coffee, she found that she was okay with it.
Christopher MooreYou bitch! You killed me! You suck!
Christopher MooreTags: you-suck
Blessed are the dumbfucks.
Christopher MooreTags: beatitudes
It's hard for me, a Jew, to stay in the moment. Without the past, where is the guilt? And without the future, where is the dread? And without guilt and dread, who am I?
Christopher MooreScience, you don't know, looks like magic.
Christopher MooreShe was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species.
Christopher MooreTags: parenthood humourous
The hip-hop guy nodded curtly, like he knew that, and despite appearances to the contrary, he had not been trippin', but had, in fact, been chillin' like a mo-fuckin' villain, so step the fuck off, wigga. He crossed against the light, limping slightly under the weight of the subtext.
Christopher MooreHe wanted her to experience all the glorious cheese of life.
Christopher MooreTags: a-dirty-job
Josh: "What is this thing?"
Gasper: "It's a Yeti. An abominable snowman."
Biff: "This is what happens when you fuck a sheep?"
Josh: "Not an abomination, abominable.
Tags: abomination
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