She didn't smile back. Not even a little. I totally needed to read that book on how to win friends and influence people. But that would involve an innate desire to win friends and influence people.

Darynda Jones


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You rented the apartment with a dead guy in the corner?” I shrugged. “I wanted the apartment, and I figured I could cover him up with a bookcase or something.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor paranormal ghost



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Your existence gives me a headache. Go stand over there.

Darynda Jones


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Bienvenido de nuevo.
Veo que los asesinos han fallado.
(Camiseta)

Darynda Jones


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If I was going to go out tonight, I was going to go out fighting. Or screaming in agony. Either way.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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When life hands you lemons say,
"Lemons? What else have you got?"
- bumper sticker

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor life-lessons



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I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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Hypothermia. That’s what they called it. I called it being freaking alive, and I couldn’t have been more grateful.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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I’m currently unsupervised
It frisks me out too but the possibilities are endless

Darynda Jones

Tags: humour



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