No dead people beyond this door,' " he read aloud from beyond the door. " 'And, yes, if you suddenly have the ability to walk through walls, you're dead. You're not lying somewhere in a drainage ditch waiting to wake up. Get over it, and stay the hell out of my bathroom.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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You stir up more hornets' nests than a twelve-year-old boy with a baseball bat. You‘re like Lois Lane on crack.

Darynda Jones


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Love was not only blind, it often careened into Blithering Idiotsville as well.

Darynda Jones


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Charley: If you‘re not going to tell
me where you are, if you‘re not going to trust me to help you, then why are you here? Why bother?
Reyes: Because you‘re the reason I breathe.

Darynda Jones


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After searching for a space, I parked behind the tattoo parlor in front of a sign that said NO PARKING. Since it didn't specify to whom it was referring, I figured it couldn't possibly be talking to me.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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He reminded me of Gerald Roma from grade school, who used to burn ants with a magnifying glass. He was never quite right. It was weird that he spontaneously combusted during finals week our freshman year in college. Payback was a bitch.

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor darynda-jones fourth-grave-beneath-my-feet



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La locura NO es algo común en mi familia. Tan solo es una visitante ocasional que se toma su tiempo e intenta conocer a todos personalmente. (Camiseta)

Darynda Jones

Tags: humor



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Okay, I’ll put someone on it. But you know, the Albuquerque Police Department wasn’t really created to find things out for you.”
“Really? That’s weird.

Darynda Jones


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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle.
—T-SHIRT

Darynda Jones


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Whoever is in charge of making sure I don’t do stupid shit is fired.
—T-SHIRT

Darynda Jones


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