Beer has that Olympic medal color,” Rot replied, “but does it have a winning taste? I’d hardly call silver a champion flavor. No, I’ll stick to my red wine.
Jarod KintzThe owner of The Mandrake Hotel and Resort is a man called Rot, a billionaire like Bill Gates, only nerdier.
Rot Kugelschreiber isn’t the name he was born with.
No, the name on his birth certificate is Dark Jar Tin Zoo. He chose that penname because in German it means Red Pen—and a Red Pen is mightier than a Red Sword, which in turn is mightier than a Rothschild.
Most of the time he goes by Rot, but occasionally he reverts back to Dark Jar Tin Zoo.
A sand trap is like a politician in its duality. It represents two opposing viewpoints. You see, it was designed to trap your ball. So it exists to have balls land in it. But it was also designed to be avoided. So it also exists to not have balls land in it. This is the beauty of golf. The game of golf is a Zen koan in action.
Jarod KintzBen had never seen another hotel quite like The Mandrake. The valets were all dressed like Roman Centurions, the Doorman was dressed like Caesar, and the bellmen all had dark blue business suits and Donald Trump wigs.
Jarod KintzDark Jar Tin Zoo’s face is sallow, his cheeks sunk in, and he looks like Edvard Munch’s “The Scream,” only less colorful.
Jarod KintzFredrick gazed into the deep blue eyes of Jackson for a few seconds before answering. “I’d like the best room in the hotel.”
“We have hundreds of rooms here, and all of them are the best.”
“How can they all be number one? Only one can be number one.”
“Ah, this is true. And this is false. What’s the best to you may be worst to someone else. Since every room here is completely different, each room is number one to someone, even if that same room is number two to someone else.”
Nobody peels a banana before stabbing themselves with it. But that’s exactly how I love—dangerously.
Jarod KintzA brick could be used to soften resistance. Smash the opposition into a pulp!
Jarod KintzI took a nap and used a napkin as a blanket. Obviously it was a small nap.
Jarod KintzI just made a fan gun. Instead of shooting bullets, it shoots the breeze. Just doing my part to make a more peaceful, and cooler, world.
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