A watched pot never boils.... but it does develop paranoia
Josh SternTags: humor absurd boils never-paranoia watched-pot
Ever feel like dialing 911 is just simply not enough, and you really need to speak to someone on the Supreme Court...?
Josh SternTags: humor supreme-court speak 911-dial
I hate cutting my wrists while shaving
Josh SternTags: cutting shaving-humor wrists
All great discoveries are made by opening up the changing room door
Josh SternTags: humor room discoveries changing opening
it can't be wrong, if it feels so wrong
Josh SternTags: humor wrong absurd-funny
Women need a reason to have sex, while men just need an angle
Josh SternTags: reason women need me angle humor-funny-absurd
Does speed dating necessarily end up in a quickie divorce....?
Josh SternTags: dating speed divorce-humor speed-dating-quickie
Everything is a drive-thru. You just have to aim really fast
Josh SternTags: humor absurd everything aim drive fast drive-thru
I hate carrying a torch, which is weird because otherwise I'm such a pyromaniac
Josh SternTags: humor weird carry pyromaniac torch
When she says 'I've never done this before" she just means with you
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