No, I am quite content with you, Bertie. By the way, I do dislike that name Bertie. I think I shall call you Harold. Yes, I am perfectly satisfied with you. You have many faults, of course. I shall be pointing some of them out when I am at leisure.

P.G. Wodehouse


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One of the poets, whose name I cannot recall, has a passage, which I am unable at the moment to remember, in one of his works, which for the time being has slipped my mind, which hits off admirably this age-old situation.

P.G. Wodehouse

Tags: books humour memory knowledge-wisdom



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Something that might have been a very hard and knobbly leg of mutton smote Lord Emsworth violently behind the ear:the sun was turned off at the main: the stars came out, many of them of a singular brightness.

P.G. Wodehouse


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A moment before this voice spoke, Lord Emsworth had been smirking. He now congealed, and the smile passed from his lips like breath off a razor, to be succeeded be a tense look of anxiety and alarm.

P.G. Wodehouse


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The first thing to do,' said Psmith, 'is to ascertain that such a place as Clapham Common really exists. One has heard of it, of course, but has its existence ever been proved? I think not.

P.G. Wodehouse


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All nice girls sketch a little.

P.G. Wodehouse


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It was a silver cow. But when I say 'cow', don't go running away with the idea of some decent, self-respecting cudster such as you may observe loading grass into itself in the nearest meadow. This was a sinister, leering, Underworld sort of animal, the kind that would spit out of the side of its mouth for twopence.

P.G. Wodehouse


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I've always treated the man with unremitting kindness, and if he wont do a little thing like this for me, I'll kick his spine through his hat.

P.G. Wodehouse


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You see', said Ukridge, ' I dislike subterfuge'.

P.G. Wodehouse


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He seemed a little uneasy, and he welcomed me with something of the gratitude of the shipwrecked mariner who sights a sail.

P.G. Wodehouse


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