Being a detective isn't all about torture and murder and monsters. Sometimes it gets truly unpleasant...The fate of the world may depend on whether or not you can bring yourself to visit your relatives.
Derek LandyAll persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Tags: humor paraphrased
If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.
E.B. WhiteTags: humor life activism pleasure
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Albert EinsteinTags: humor science attributed-no-source philosophy stupidity human-nature infinity universe
In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness.
P.G. WodehouseTags: humor
I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!
Charles M. SchulzHappiness is a warm puppy.
Charles M. SchulzTags: humor happiness animals dogs puppies
To you, I'm an atheist.
To God, I'm the loyal opposition.
I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.
Woody AllenI did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time.
She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic.
Tags: humor religion atheism absurd
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