Cheech and Chong Vs. HAL
"I can't do that Dave."
"Dave's not here, man"
"That does not compute. Dave"
"No man, Dave isn't here!!"
..."I'm sorry Dave but that is incorrect"
"No man, Dave's not here!!"
"Daisy, daisy,.... I'm self terminating now Dave...."
"No man, dave's not.....Is he gone?
Tags: humorous
I sprayed my dog with off and he still sits in my favorite chair!!
Neil LeckmanTags: humorous
I don't know why they call them Cheerios, I ate an entire box and didn't feel any happier!!
Neil LeckmanTags: humorous
When the watermelons were as large as a child's head, the women boiled them, but they collapsed into a tasteless green mush that no one could eat, not the children, not the cow.
Annie ProulxTags: food mistakes humorous historical
Y’all reporters like my quotes, don’t you. Yeah, my quotes are Shaqalicious.
Shaquille O'NealTags: humorous
Here you go, dear."" The corners of Mrs. Colbert's mouth curled up. "You like meat, don't you?"
Emily blinked. Was it her, or did that statement seem...loaded? She checked Issac for his reaction, but he was innocently selecting a roll from a wicker basket. "Uh, thanks." Emily said, pulling the platter toward her. She did like meat. The kind you, um, eat.
Tags: humorous suggestive
Steampunk is nothing more than what happens when Goths discover brown.
Charles StrossTags: humorous from-a-blog-post
And I was all, "Don't be gross, you crustacious fuck. You pull that thing out and I'll pepper-spray you until you fry." (You have to be stern with weenie waggers--I've been exposed to on the bus over seventeen times, so I know.)
Christopher MooreSo I'm all, "Owned! Bee-yatch! Dog fucking owned you!" Doing a minor booty dance of ownage, perhaps, in retrospect, a bit prematurely. (I believe hip-hop to be the apprpriate language for taunting, at least until I learn French.)
Christopher MooreTags: humorous
Papa, potatoes, poultry, prunes and prism, are all very good words for the lips.
Charles DickensTags: humorous
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