Sell your book like a can of beans
Stuart AkenI’m going to strip my way through plumber’s school. What do you think of the stage name Fine-Ass Frankie?
Rebecca MurphyTags: school funny humorous stripping bad-plans
One year I went as a pirate, but from then on I went as a hobo. It's a word you don't hear anymore. Along with 'tramp,' it's been replaced by 'homeless person,' which isn't the same thing. Unlike someone who was evicted or lost his house in a fire, the hobo roughed it by choice. Being at liberty, unencumbered by bills and mortgages, better suited his drinking schedule, and so he found shelter wherever he could, never a bum, but something much less threatening, a figure of merriment, almost.
David SedarisTags: humorous
I'm dating myself, but this was before Jesus Christ. We worshiped a God named Sashatiba, who had five eyes, including one on the Adam's apple.
David SedarisCayl replies...I understand the human reproductive system, Agent Denning; I’m here to capture a killer, not indulge in these intrusive human senses.
Tielle St. ClareTags: humorous
She was thong-climbing-her-ass pissed.
Caris RoaneTags: humorous
Well, looks like you won't be reaching nirvana anytime soon."
She pushed a stray lock of hair off her forehead and sniffed. "Yes, I suppose that's true. I guess I'll just have to settle for a trip to Idaho.
Tags: humorous
Magnanimous of you.'
His mouth twitched. 'Mmm. Use more words like that, please. Schoolmistress words. Long, impressive ones.' He'd made the last three words sound like an innuendo.
Ish #19 "If your diet soda has zero calories, zero sugar and zero fat, what the hell are you drinking?
Regina GriffinTags: humor humorous funny-but-true funny-and-random funny-quotes
Ish #153 "Artificial plants grow best in artificial light.
Regina GriffinTags: humor humorous funny-but-true funny-quotes tags-funny-and-random
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