By the way he reacted, you would have thought I told him that slavery never happened. He laid into me with the same gusto as a right-wing political pundit on the O'Reilly Factor defending President Bush's right to vacation six days out of the week.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor reaction

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This was just the way I imagined myself around Nancy Grace--available, yet distant.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor nancy-grace

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She cried the first time she was pulled over by a cop. I explained to her that there is no reason to cry when getting pulled over--unless you're coming directly from from a crime scene.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor cops

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If I had seen pictures of people eating each other on the wall, I would've told him I was into cannibalism.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor lies lying cannibalism awkward compulsive-lying

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I don't know who thought up waxing, but it was clearly the same person who invented Vicodin.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor waxing

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I love people who have such passion for complete nonsense.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor passion

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My mother is the antithesis of a typical Jewish mother, she is very soft-spoken and takes more naps that a cat. As a result, I've always longed for someone to really annoy the shit out of me.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor family parents jewish-mother

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We checked our bags and got on line with some of our fellow passengers. Judging from the looks of them, it was clear that they were members of a different income bracket from the people I preferred to surround myself with. But since I also wasn't from the income bracket I preferred, I held off on voicing my initial feelings of despair.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor travel

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I could tell the raciest things these women had ever been involved in was a co-ed game of Connect Four.

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor risque conservative racy

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I have a question. Is it okay to drink while you're pregnant...if you're planning on giving the baby up for adoption?

Chelsea Handler

Mots clés humor drinking alcohol pregnancy

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