Because there's no way on earth she's going to make it through college unless she grows some serious ovaries and turns this train wreck around

Lisa McMann

Tag: humor funny wake lisa-mcmann



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To answer your question, you want me because I'm made of awesome.

Gena Showalter

Tag: humor funny



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Wer lügt, hat die Wahrheit immerhin gedacht.

Oliver Hassencamp

Tag: truth humour funny



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Umgangsformen sind Formen, die zunehmend umgangen werden.

Oliver Hassencamp

Tag: wisdom truth humour funny



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If you're ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol. Not so much the House of Representatives, which has a bit more color and texture, but the Senate -- jeez. Yes, let's have more testosterone running the country.

Maximum Ride, School's Out--Forever

James Patterson

Tag: funny senate maximum-ride capitol



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Took me a while to get to the point today, but that is because I did not know what the point was when I started.

William Safire

Tag: funny



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You have food?" Winter scolded. "I thought you said you were hungry."
I'm hungry for other things besides what I have," [Clover] argued.

Obert Skye

Tag: food funny winter clover geth hungry



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What was that you gave me to eat?" Winter panicked.
A Filler Crisp," Clover said, his eyes seventy percent concerned and thirty percent mischievous.

Obert Skye

Tag: food funny winter clover geth hungry



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[Clover] secretly hitched a ride with a nice German couple and their new baby...Clover appeared to the baby, so as to be a delightful, soothing surprise. Well, the child did like Clover. In fact, she held him and cooed. When the parents turned around to look at her and saw their child holding a furry, living creature, they needlessly panicked.

Obert Skye

Tag: food funny winter clover geth hungry



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(True,) the white hole said. (My name is Khairelikoblepharehglukumeilichephreidosd'enagouni-) and at the same time he went flickering through a pattern of colors that was evidently the visual translation.

Diane Duane

Tag: funny



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