Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth.
George BurnsYou can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.
George BurnsIf you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.
George BurnsSincerity - if you can fake that, you've got it made.
George BurnsActing is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.
George BurnsTags: acting
I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.
George BurnsTags: humor
Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.
George BurnsI look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.
George BurnsYou know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
George BurnsTags: getting-old
Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.
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