The best Quotes on Earth!

Some people like milk, but I would never drink anything you have to stroke out of an animal.

Tags: humor

He’s always overly dressed which makes him look stiff – like he wants to do taxes, not women.

Tags: humor

I have no excuse, neither real nor invented so I let my platinum express do the talking instead.

Tags: humor

Make life easier by living in the present and believing in the future.

My view on feng shui: don’t put your bed in front of the door because you won’t get in.

You are so beautiful, I could eat you,” he said.
And it was true. Her smile was as intoxicating as the wine.
And he could eat her.

Terry loved candlelight dinners and red wine. It was a nice contrast from work.
And killing people.

You have really nice teeth,” Terry said and thought they could be excellent for his collection of human body parts.

You sick bastard,” she said.
“Yes, I guess you could call me that." Terry replied.

I guess all my afternoon beers and burgers were catching up with me, which made me want to scream THEN WHY NOT MY HAIR!?

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