The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.
Rita Mae BrownLife is like a box of chocolates.
Winston GroomTags: humor
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
Robin WilliamsOf all ridiculous things the most ridiculous seems to me, to be busy — to be a man who is brisk about his food and his work. Therefore, whenever I see a fly settling, in the decisive moment, on the nose of such a person of affairs; or if he is spattered with mud from a carriage which drives past him in still greater haste; or the drawbridge opens up before him; or a tile falls down and knocks him dead, then I laugh heartily.
Søren KierkegaardTags: humor bourgeoise haste hurry ridiculousness
Did you know that I can see you?
Katt WilliamsTags: humor
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody come sit next to me.
Alice Roosevelt LongworthDid you ever see anybody so disgusting: said lightning to thunder, "never," growled thunder, "let's give him the works.
William SteigTags: humor
You're...standing...in...my...KUMQUATS!
Tom JonesTags: humor
The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.
Douglas AdamsTags: humor drinking bar-guide
Room service? Send up a larger room."
[A Night at the Opera]
Tags: humor hotel-rooms hotels room-service
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