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If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.

Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.

Robert E. Howard

Tag: humor life politics society

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Maugham then offers the greatest advice anyone could give to a young author: "At the end of an interrogation sentence, place a question mark. You'd be surprised how effective it can be.

Woody Allen

Tag: humor writing-advice irony interrogation-marks writing-tips

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Pasteboard pies and paper flowers are being banished from the stage by the growth of that power of accurate observation which is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it....

George Bernard Shaw

Tag: humor

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Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.
Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git.
Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor.
Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball.

J.K. Rowling

Tag: humor harry-potter james-potter remus-lupin sirius-black snape wormtail

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No one can be right all the time, but it helps to be right most of the time.

Robert Half

Tag: humor

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So many things to see, people to do.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: humor paraphrased

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Everyone Except Willie, so now why