Leap out the window, my inner Tigress cried. You aren't ready to face such a powerful Tiger. I frowned. I thought a true Tigress never backed down from a fight. Don't you know anything? When she's in heat, she avoids everything male. Now run!
Gena ShowalterTags: funny
But that quickly faded, and he frowned. "You're bleeding," he said. "What happened?"
Claire sighed and held up her wrist to show him the bandage. "Man, you would be so embarrassed if I said it was something else." Michael looked blank. "I'm a girl, Michael, it could have been all natural, you know. Tampons?
Tags: funny morganville-vampires
The reason for the unreason with which you treat my reason , so weakens my reason that with reason I complain of your beauty.
Miguel de Cervantes SaavedraEthan Wyeth: I hope you're thirsty."
Gideon Wyeth:"Why?"
Ethan: "Cause your dumb and ugly, but I can do something about thirsty.
Tags: humour funny stupid advent-rising
You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!!
Bill WattersonTags: education school funny calvin-and-hobbes comic
I like stepping into the future. Therefore, I look for doorknobs.
Mark RosenI'm not the smartest fellow in the world, but I can sure pick smart colleagues.
Franklin D. RooseveltTags: humor politics usa funny
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.
Will RogersWhen life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.
Cathy GuisewiteI'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.
Hillary Rodham Clinton« first previous
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